Acceptance, Is That Too Much? {Zara}

[Akira]

Rayas sighed as he walked through the lower caverns. It was the one place he felt he could be alone since it was supper time, and most of Trelis would be at the dining hall. He shook his head and leaned against one of the walls. He slid down the wall so that he was sitting on the floor and stared up at the ceiling. So this is what it feels like to be completely and utterly hated. He thought he was alone, so that's why he spoke alowd to himself.

Rayas shook his head and buried his face in his arms which were wrapped around his knees. At that moment he really was regretting following his father to this place, and wondered if it was at all possible to transfer back to Southern. At least there I don't feel like an outcast. He sighed into his lap, and wondered if he would ever get used to this place. Though, he doubted that the people of Trelis would ever get used to him, or accept him for that matter.

Rayas truly felt like crying at that moment, then he thought about what his father would say if he found him crying like a small child. He wouldn't be happy...that's for sure. Oh Faranth why is it so hard for him to say he loves me? He turned his face up to the ceiling again as he spoke. He wished that he would get answer that would explain everything to him. That would tell him what he needed to do in order for his father to accept him as he was.

[Zara]

Can you still see the heart of me?
All my agony fades away
when you hold me in your embrace

Iirla held her dying glow closer to the inventory list in her hand. Underneath it was another list - a list of the refugees who were here with them. She was muttering to herself, but soon looked up an stopped short quietly, watching the boy as he agonized. Oh... the poor kid. Her dad was the supposed new Weyrleader. Everyone hated him. And his Southern Riders... but... this kid. This kid didn't deserve this.

She felt a pang in her heart at his words and very casually and very quietly walked up and sat next to him. "Hi," she said simply and quietly to him. "Those words are heavy and hard for some people because... well.... They don't understand them entirely yet. Love is a hard word to wrap ones mind around some times, I guess..." She smiled at him warmly. "Don't mind me... I just heard you talking to yourself.... and I thought you deserved someone to talk to you. My name is Iirla. I'm the Junior Weyrwoman." She held out her hand to him so that he could shake it if he wanted to. "Sorry if I'm intruding at all."

That was about the time that Ama and Trivol decided to show up. Ama landed on Rayas' head and demanded that he would pamper her while Trivol, believing the world revolved around him, went right up to them and started chittering, demanding that he be oiled and care for that instant.

Izanycorth rumbled from where she waited outside the Lower Caverns for hers to return to her. I will deal with them, Mine... just talk to him. Izanycorth snapped her orders onto the two flitters and with, some minor satisfaction traced with dismay, forced them into obedience and to be better mannered. Both of them returned to Iirla, perching on her shoulders and looking at the boy with swirling eyes. "Sorry about them... this is Ama, and the blue here is Trivol." She pointed to them each in turn before wrapping her arms around her knees. "Sorry Trelis hasn't been real friendly to you.... I mean... I'm not overly happy with everything myself, as I'm sure you understand... but there is no reason why that should spill over onto you."

Don't tear me down for all I need
Make my heart a better place
Give me something I can believe
Don't tear me down
You've opened the door now, don't let it close

[Akira]

Rayas sighed, and shook his head. Of course he wouldn't get an answer. He put his face back into his arms as he felt the first tears trying to break free. He didn't notice that someone had been listening to him, or was now walking towards him. He jumped when he heard someone speak to him, and thought he felt his heart trying to beat out of his chest. He looked at her, and thought she looked familiar. He tried to control his breathing, and soon was breathing normally again.

Rayas listened to her words, and wondered just how long she had been listening to him. Then he realized where he had seen her before. You were there when my father and the others arrived. It wasn't the most intelligent thing to say, but that's all he could make come out of his mouth. Almost immediately he regretted saying it. Sorry, I didn't mean that. Great, just great. He was making a real good impression on the locals wasn't he?

Rayas wished he could bang his head against the wall with how stupid he felt. He took her outstretched hand, and shook it gently. He looked at her, and wondered why she was being so nice to him. No, you're not intruding. He shook his head slowly as he spoke. He still didn't understand why she was being so nice to him, but he was glad he wasn't alone anymore. Maybe I will be accepted after all. The thought had him smiling, just a little.

Rayas' eyes widened when he felt something land on the top of his head. He then heard something demanding something from him. He raised an eye brow at the little blue firelizard that started chittering at him. Then, all of a sudden, the stopped and went over to their owner. No, it's fine. I've never seen a firelizard like her before. He was guessing that the one that had landed on his head was a female, and hopped Iirla wouldn't be too upset with him if it wasn't.

Rayas looked down at his knees when he listened to Iirla talk. No, it's quite alright. I would have done the same thing if I were you. After all, I'm sure you know I'd support my father. Just as I did earlier today. He had a very dark, very distant expression on his face, and it seemed as though his pale green eyes had grown two shades darker as he spoke. He had known that coming here would be hard, but he had had no idea that things were going to be this rough between the two people.

Oh well, you shouldn't be worrying about this stuff. You should be celebrating. You're people are back and I'm sure more than one of your friends will be looking for you. Rayas smiled over at Iirla as he spoke. It wasn't exactly a happy smile, but he did his best to show her that he was alright. Even if he didn't feel so alright. She belonged here, with her people. Him on the other hand, still had to figure out where he belonged, and he wasn't sure this was it.